I look at the clouds out my window and recognize a familiar path that my heart and my frame have traveled more times than I can count in this moment. My passport has the stamps to prove it. I just flipped through that little blue book with all of it’s immigration enterings and departings and was overcome in some ways by the stories that are held within those pages. So many arrivals, so many goodbyes. So many prayers that we would know how to come near suffering in its purest form, the most ravishing forms that I have ever witnessed with these eyes and this life. A multitude of faces flood my mind as I think about who I have traveled with, who we have met in our journey, the stories attached, marked with those dates that all mean something. Some journeys gone solo. Many times teams of people who have given up a week of vacation to move near and sacrifice and serve. Some arrivals and much time before departing again. Some few day trips because my heart needed to see my boys and remind them they’re amazing and chosen by God. I am humbled as I think about the gift of this particular vain of my life. It has had some incredibly rich moments, some horrible mistakes, much revelation about who God truly is – coupled with the most enormous doubts while living in the middle of seemingly unrelenting suffering and pain. And somewhere in the swirl of all of that – rich remains. Depth of both sorrow and joy. An enlarged heart that both beats with deeper compassion and stronger conviction about much. A strange mix but one I wouldn’t trade.
There’s something about this plane ride that somehow always feels like a trek through my own heart. Somehow between that “Ladies and gentleman, we are preparing for departure,” and the “Ladies and gentleman we are approaching our final descent,” my heart has traveled almost as many miles as this airplane.
And so we embark upon another stamp in this passport, another story waiting to be written, another week full of opportunities to touch my soul and shape my faith and advance the family of God and the movement of the Kingdom on this planet. I am ill-equipped and unqualified for this…I know it. I’m reminded every single time these wheels touch down.
BUT THEN GOD…
Moves in. Takes over. Empowers. Leads by His Spirit. Purposes every step. Wrecks my own pride. Whispers in my ear of my place as His daughter. Reveals His heart for these people. Leaves me undone.
And by the time the next stamp enters this passport a week from now, another precious package of memories will be symbolized within that one stamp and this one trip.
We only get the chance to do this date and stamp once, please pray with us that we do it well…whatever well may look like for such a time as this.