Well it’s a new year, and for most of us, we begin it with both a reflection backward at all the memories and a forward gaze at the new adventures yet to come. My heart still finds itself there this morning. Recounting and yet ready for a clean calendar and a fresh start in 2013. There were a truckload of blessings in 2012. There was a truckload of hard. Each seemed to come in equal measure last year. It’s not always that way, but it was for sure for my heart in the past 365 days we call a year.
I started a new devotional book recently called “Everyday Prayers” by Scotty Smith and I thought yesterdays entry spoke so well to my heart concerning my past year. A mixture of glad and sad.
I pray it blesses you as we think toward beginning this new year with our eyes on Jesus aware of who we are and how desperately we need Him.
Here are my honest new years resolutions so far.
To know Him more.
To love Him more deeply.
I figure a whole lot of other goodness will come from those two things. I’m formulating prayerfully a more thorough list of goals, but these two are really the deepest cry of my heart right now. I am weary of who other people tell me He is and pretending that I know those things in my own knower. I want to KNOW His voice clearly among a thousand others. I want to bend my ear to hear what He wants to speak and KNOW that it’s His voice because I KNOW His heart. I am aware of how much more I have to learn about His LOVE…for me personally, not some corporate He is nuts about you, loves the whole world, sort of love. (While that’s super true.) I want to KNOW more fully the kind of LOVE that you learn while nestled up near His heart hearing Him speak into the places in your soul that only His love can mend. That sort of knowing Him and loving Him.
I offer those goals and words not from a cliche easy place because this is what we are supposed to say. I sorta groan them from somewhere deep this year. Looking back I see the effects of losing this as my souls only aim. Gazing forward I see all we have to gain as He reveals more of Himself to my heart.
Sad and glad. I think that’s a great summary for 2012 for this girl. Looking forward to all that is to come in the next 365 days of “groaning and growing in grace”.
Blessings as you groan and grow in 2013 as well.